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Oh almighty flist, advise me.
Jan. 11th, 2012 05:34 pmSo,
R and I have been seeing each other since the middle of September.
I've looked through my cell usage since we've met, and we've been in more or less continuous contact since then ( thank god for free carrier to carrier calling and my unlimited text plan). We've been essentially dating since we've met, but only made it official on November 6th.
Since then, I've met his family at Thanksgiving, and it went well.
He's met my brother right before Christmas and that went well. I get along well enough with his folks to have successfully enlisted his mother's help to surprise him on Christmas eve with a present.
We've been spanding more and more time together, and when we've ended up spending Christmas apart, it really, really sucked badly. I'd turn around and want to tell him something, and he wouldn't be there...
We've spend multiple nights together, up to three consecutive nights at his pace ( because I cant take the Fuzz with me to a non cat proof house), and 4 nights at my place ( because he cant just bring everything he'd need for a week cross town). It's great when we're together, puttering around, just doing small things like cooking together, or sorting laundry, or just doing homework. We've had a rough patch or two, and we've talked it out, dealt with a hurt feelings and I think emerged better for it.
I am currently sans roommate and his apartment is an awful rathole where he barely spends time anyway, because, and I quote "A house is not a home."
All of this is to say, we're planning on moving in together sometime in either February or March, instead of early summer as we had originally planned. I'm yo-yoing between elated and excited and utterly terrified that it's too early and we'll end up hating each other.
The people who have seen us together for more than one time have been almost uniformly of the opinion that:
We are in agreement on not mingling our finances at all, but instead of setting up a joint account for household expenses.
Housekeeping wise, we are very similar in that we're both laid back, but he gets the run of the kitchen being the bigger cook, and I get the bathroom as my domain.
There aren't co-dependence red flags so far, and we have different sets of friends and very different lives of our own.
The only person who has against us moving in, is my best friend here, who was adamant that its too early. I didn't really have an answer when she asked what the harm of waiting was, except that I'm miserable without him around.
But now I'm terrified that we're moving too fast and will fizzle and be stuck living together and hating each other.
Kid brother suggested that we do a 2 week trial to see if we can live together and not hate each other, and if it works, then he's give notice on his place.
Thoughts?
R and I have been seeing each other since the middle of September.
I've looked through my cell usage since we've met, and we've been in more or less continuous contact since then ( thank god for free carrier to carrier calling and my unlimited text plan). We've been essentially dating since we've met, but only made it official on November 6th.
Since then, I've met his family at Thanksgiving, and it went well.
He's met my brother right before Christmas and that went well. I get along well enough with his folks to have successfully enlisted his mother's help to surprise him on Christmas eve with a present.
We've been spanding more and more time together, and when we've ended up spending Christmas apart, it really, really sucked badly. I'd turn around and want to tell him something, and he wouldn't be there...
We've spend multiple nights together, up to three consecutive nights at his pace ( because I cant take the Fuzz with me to a non cat proof house), and 4 nights at my place ( because he cant just bring everything he'd need for a week cross town). It's great when we're together, puttering around, just doing small things like cooking together, or sorting laundry, or just doing homework. We've had a rough patch or two, and we've talked it out, dealt with a hurt feelings and I think emerged better for it.
I am currently sans roommate and his apartment is an awful rathole where he barely spends time anyway, because, and I quote "A house is not a home."
All of this is to say, we're planning on moving in together sometime in either February or March, instead of early summer as we had originally planned. I'm yo-yoing between elated and excited and utterly terrified that it's too early and we'll end up hating each other.
The people who have seen us together for more than one time have been almost uniformly of the opinion that:
- The moving in is pretty much inevitable.
- If we are comfortable with it now, we should do it now.
- All the fears we are having now will still be here a year from now, and won't be resolved until we actually live together.
We are in agreement on not mingling our finances at all, but instead of setting up a joint account for household expenses.
Housekeeping wise, we are very similar in that we're both laid back, but he gets the run of the kitchen being the bigger cook, and I get the bathroom as my domain.
There aren't co-dependence red flags so far, and we have different sets of friends and very different lives of our own.
The only person who has against us moving in, is my best friend here, who was adamant that its too early. I didn't really have an answer when she asked what the harm of waiting was, except that I'm miserable without him around.
But now I'm terrified that we're moving too fast and will fizzle and be stuck living together and hating each other.
Kid brother suggested that we do a 2 week trial to see if we can live together and not hate each other, and if it works, then he's give notice on his place.
Thoughts?
